I told myself that I would maintain this profile active, and I would start producing more stuff and everything, but I see now that I can't really keep up with it.

I'm not gonna lie to you, I've been free from university exams for like two weeks, and I still can't keep up with it. I want to do the stuff that I like, I want to post often, but I can barely get out of bed in the morning (and when I do get out of bed I can't leave my bedroom, sometimes not even for food)

I've been practising, with watercolors, so I might dump a couple of doodles every now and then on my art thread, but I'm gonna take a break from working on anything, at least until I can get my shit sorted out and fixed. I've already started to try to change this, I started working out and I even asked my mom to come help me look for a therapist. I've been existing like this for so long that I got used to it and now I got sick of it. I don't want to waste my life as I have wasted my teenage years.

I'm not asking you to care about me, that's not what this is all about. The point of this post is to tell you why I haven't been active, and I hope that putting this out there might motivate me to get the help that I need and put my shit together; if there's something that I don't like to do is go back on my own words, I'm telling the internet that I'm gonna get help so that I can be more active on the site, so I better do it. After all, the internet is a place full of opportunities, having an internet presence might help me in the future and I definitely want to grow as an illustrator, even if I just do it as a hobby, and having internet records can help. Also, putting this into words that I can read has helped me realize how crazy it actually is to not even leave my room to eat, holy fuck I feel like an idiot for not realizing earlier.

fuck this post got very long, im sorry

TL;DR: I'm garbage and I'm gonna get help so that I can be more active on the internet and irl too.

Have a nice day...